some stories ::

“They who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night.”

⏤ Edgar Allan Poe

hal klopper's sampling of essays


My intense hatred for people assigning national stereotypes combines with my pain to produce a grimace that looks eastern European.

When She Saw

Ben has a dog but he really wants a talking robot that’s good to him and zaps the bad guys with a thousand volts of electricity.

Early Irving Flungberg

I would not at all be opposed to any of you, especially one of the eggwomen, licking my face right now. Anyone? No? Very well.